This last week

I guess to could say this last week was pretty full of suprises.

First of my boyfriend and I had a couple BIG convos. on what churches we go to. He is cathlic and I am baptist. He said he wouldn't become a baptist and that hurt my feelings because he didn't even give it a chance. But after we talked for a while, we both agree that God is what is important and that we both believe in the same person so what does it matter what we are. We are both christains and THAT'S what is the big picture here. After talking about soooo many things with the differences of our churches and stuff, I felt a lot better. We even what to get a new bible together so that we can both try and read and discuse things together. It would be a great thing to do and bring us closer to God and closer to eachother.

Alright...another thing that doens't nesesurally suprise me but just is really annoying is that a girl that I know in my classes as school is sooo...Idk...stupid because she said that I was here best friend here and then once she made some other friends at work and stuff I was really happy for her but then she said the only reason we were ever friends was because she had no one else. How rude!! So now all I can think about when she ever does talk to me(which is only when she has a question or something to brag about and has no one else to brag to)is that she is such a rude person and fake to people. I see it now when she is fake to others because she use to do that to me. Guess what....she talked to me 2 times this last week. Friends huh? yeah...RIIIIIGHT.

School was heckick with midterms and such. Plus my job at the school was soooo busy. I had sooo much to do in a little amount of time. But I managed to get it all done. YEAH!!!

I had to work friday at the clinic but that went pretty well for once. Everyone was really nice I guess. I had to help with one of the students that was there to learn and practice. What a nut job! He was soooooo incretably slow...I mean come on...do you have to line up your tubes three times! NO! Plus he would leave the needle lay there...you NEVER do that. So I had to say something to him. Jeeesh.

Well I am working this weekend in my hometown again like every weekend pretty much so I guess that's pretty much it.
I only have to study for 1 big test for next week so I am happy I don't have a lot of homework for once on the weekend.

Best friend huh?

So I don't understand how a best friend could be so rude as to stop talking to there best friend with out saying what's going on.
I was there to help with everything and then the next day was wondering how she was doing and then she can't say a thing?!?!

What friend just egnores there friend completely and have no reason for doing that.

oh...and also lie about saying she doesn't cut anymore but then posts it on myspace!!! GEEESSSHHHHH.

a doctor?....and cute!!!

haha. Okay...so I'll explain the title here.

Yesterday I was working at one of the clinics that I work at and the hospital is conected but I have never gone over there before because I haven't ever really had a reason to. So anyway...we had to drop something of at there lab and I didn't know where it was so one of the girls I work with said I could go with to check it out.

First of the hospital looked beautiful and like it was a nice place to be I guess you could say.(Not that a hospital is every a nice place to really be in but I think you know what I mean.) So anyway, on the way there as we where weaving there the hallways, there was two doctors walking tward us and one looked up and smiled...like one of those stupid boyish smiles when they like someone...and he said Hi to me. He looked pretty young too!!!and cute!!! lol.

I love my boyfriend very very very much but it was just very flattering that a doctor was all boyishly smileing and saying hi to me. It made me feel a little better about myself at that moment. (I usually feel like I'm nothing really much at all I guess you could say.)

Last NIght

So last night my boyfriend and I got in a fight. I hate this. I feel like everything just seems like it is falling apart. School stresses me out and feeling like I'm being just a pain in my bf's side.
I don't want to make him sad but I wanted to hang out with my friends....and I said I was sorry I was upset that I find out what he is up to from everyone else.
I just don't want him to deside that he doesn't want me in his life anymore.

I don't know what I would do if that happened.

wow I am tired!

So I just texted my mom because I am pretty much almost falling asleep at work. I'm so freakin TIRED!!! I went to bed at 9:00pm last night too! Geeeesssshhhh. Well them my mom ended up calling when she got the text and said that dad is going to be making some coffee soon and he will drop some off for me at work(the Hospital). Gosh I can't wait. I don't even really like coffee but I am soooo tired. Maybe it will help wake me up! AAAAAHHHHHH!

OMG!!!

Oh My Gosh!!! So my boyfriend went out to breakfast with his friend but then before leaving town...they stopped to say goodbye before they left!

That was soooo nice of them. It made me happy to see my man before he left.

homecoming in my hometown lastnight

So homecoming was not what it use to be anymore. It isn't nearly as fun and no one seems to cheer the team on anymore. And the Band....Oh boy....don't even get me started. Band was the biggest thing...We were the best of the best. I had so much pride to be in that band because it was the best and it was soooo much fun. The band is so much smaller now.

Anyway, I had my boyfriend come to my hometown with me for the homecoming football game. I don't think it was the funnest for him considering how it seems to be now here. Anyway, we went out to eat and had a couple drinks with some of his friends that are from around here and then he actually stayed at my families home with me!!!! I was so happy. It was so nice to be able to spend some time on the start of a weekend.

So now he is still sleeping I'm guessing in my bedroom. haha. He is going back to where we live(my college town) but I just wish he would stay the weekend. I'll be living to go back tomorrow anyway after work. I was just thinking that I could talk him out to my grandpa's land and go look around and I could show him some stuff. There's a creek on the land to and my grandpa is making a walking trail to it and I wanted us to go see it and have grandpa show us cause my grandpa would love that sooooo much. But I'm sure he won't stay....He will want to go back home. I just thought since he actually had the weekend off, he could stay.

Another day that I feel like $h*t!!!

So I don't know if he even cares! Does he even love me....what the heck is going on! Sometimes he confuses me....

For example: I understand that he hates his job and it stresses him out so he smokes and drink. But why does he have to do it soooo much. I think he may just use it as an excuse sometimes.....like if he were to quit and go back to his old job that he likes, he'd still do it. I would hope it would cut back to him at least not pukeing sometimes. I hate it when he does that. He is the one that is hurting his body by doing that stuff and I'm the only one worried about it.

GOSH!!!

Tooooo Much to Do

I just need to vent cause I have sooooooooooooooo much homework this weekend and I don't know how I am ever going to get it all done. The classes that I always have homework really loaded it on this week and the classes that don't usually give homework did!!!! What's going on! Plus I work all weekend like every weekend. How will I EVER get everything done?!?!

P.S. I feel like this a lot. There is just not enough time in the day to get everything done. I just don't know what to do.

My boyfriend and my best friend smoke

So, as I have writing on here before I'm sure I have said something about how I work in a hospital and a clinic. Well I work almost every weekend in the hospital but this weekend I got to see first hand how painful lung cancer has to be. This person was young too! I don't think people that smoke really know that it can hit you at any time in your life. This guy is sooooo sick right now and it just isn't pretty at all. He was pukeing up parts of his lungs even and his body it trying to heal itself and it is just making him sicker and. . . . You just have noooo idea.

I never want to see my boyfriend or best friend go through that but I know my best friend makes it clear that she doesn't want to quit and if someone wants to make her...that they aren't worth it. I just hope someday she desides on her own before it gets to that and I hope she doesn't have to see it for herself because it isn't pleasant to see.

I know my boyfriend as tried to quit before..even a few times but I understand it is really really hard to do. I just wish he could do it and it would work this time. I really don't want to ever see him go through that. It is soooooo bad!!!

I just know that I will never forget that experience and I never want to become a smoker because I would never want to go through that.
I hate it even when people smoke around me but sometimes it's hard to get away from when you are in a bar.

only 6 more hours

I only have 6 more hours of work today and then I can go home and pack my stuff up to go back to my home in Wausau. I can't wait to be done. I'm sick of working and I have tons of homework to do and I don't have much time to ever do it. I just need some "me" time to so that's why I'm writing on here.
Do you ever feel like that??? Like all you do is work work work and go to school and have tons of homework and it never ends. So stressful. I just need one day for myself to do nothing at all but sleep and finally feel fully rested. I never feel like I sleep anymore. I feel physically and emotionally drained and I am kinda sick of it.
What do I do???
And why can't I just turn my mind of when it IS time for bed. I mean come on...everyone else seems to be able to do it. But no not me...I sit there and worry and thing about all the things I need to get done the next day and what I didn't do that day that I should have done but didn't have time...or how I should have said things to people..or maybe I should have done this instead of that on that project...IT NEVER ENDS!!!! AAAAAHHHHHH.

need to vent a little

WOW!!! Today has been busy....and stressful. I had class from 8:00 - 9:45 and then I had work class from 10:00 - 2:30. I got a lot done so that is good but it was so much busy work. Then when I got home I called my mom but she couldn't talk so she called when she was done with work. She told me a bunch of things about my sis and stuff and then we got into a big fight. Gosh I HATE FIGHTING. So she is all mad at me and that makes it soooooooo hard for me to concentrant on things I need to be doing right now like HOMEWORK. I called my dad even to talk to him about it and he said I should worry about it and he said he would talk to her. Well that is the most of it.
Untill next time.......peace out. Stangborn

How sweet

So my boyfriend got me this beautiful pandora charm braclete that I have been wanting since...like...forever. He got three charms on it too all for my 21st birthday this year.
Well you wouldn't beleive what he did on Friday!!!!! Well we were going out to eat before we went the new batman movie(my treat for him cause he really really really wanted to see it) and the jewelry story was by the place we where going to eat but he started walking somewhere else instead of in the restaurant. I was like,"where are you going?". He said he wanted ot see what was at best buy but then he turned to the left and we where right in front of the jewelry story. I TOTALLY felt like the girl on sweet home alabama. haha. He took me in to pick out another charm for my braclete and two clams to hold them in one section.(if you have over seen them you would know what I am talking about)
I just couldn't be leave he did that just for the heck of it. No special reason. They are sooo expencive.
It was sooooo sweet though.
I'm really lucky to have a thoughtful guy.

Think before you speak.... LOL.

Thought this was funny and worth passing on.




Think before you speak...

Here are six reasons why you should think before you speak - the last one is great!
Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back... or that you could crawl into a hole?

Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did....


FIRST TESTIMONY:
I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?"

I turned around and walked back out and never went back My husband didn't say a word... he knew better.

SECOND TESTIMONY:
I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls.
I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using.

After browsing for several minutes,

I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store.

He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said, "I think I like playing with mens balls"

THIRD TESTIMONY:
My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of candy and nuts.
As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help.
I replied, "No, I'm just looking at your nuts."

My sister started to laugh hysterically.

The boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away. To this day, my sister has never
let me forget.

FOURTH TESTIMONY:
While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some pent-up energy
and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I told her that if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be punished.

To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening,

"If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!"
The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing.

I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me, were screams of laughter.


FIFTH TESTIMONY:

Have you ever asked your child a question too many times?

My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was on him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch, in between errands It was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco, I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my seven-month-old daughter, she was clean.

Then realized that Danny had not asked to go potty in a while. I asked him if he needed to go, and he said "No"

I kept thinking "Oh Lord, that child has had an accident, and I don't have any clothes with me." Then I said,

"Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?"

"No," he replied.

I just KNEW that he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse. Soooooo, I asked one more time, "Danny did you have an accident ? This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, bent over, spread his cheeks and yelled

"SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!"

While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing, he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down.

An old couple made me feel better, thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!

LAST BUT NOT LEAST TESTIMONY:
This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she speaks. What happens when you predict snow but don't get any!

We had a female news anchor that, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked:
"So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?"
Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!

Now, didn't that feel good?
Pass it on to someone you know who needs a laugh and remember we all say things we don't really mean, so think before you speak!!!!!

Another job

So I have another little job at school for between classes. Today was my first day and lets just say . . . . . . . . I'm stressed. haha. I sure hope I can do this. I'm a little scared.

Well I guess we will see if I can do it. Who knows...Maybe I will end up liking it. I just won't get any time to chill now with school and my two other big jobs. Boy oh boy.

Just another day...

Just another day at the good old hospital on the weekend like always...haha. Sometimes I really an not sure why I pick the medical feild. I mean come on! I am exposed to soooooo many different deseases and stuff that I can catch because of my job. Sometimes that's enough to make you wanna take a shower and scrub your skin RIGHT OFF!!! haha.

Even though there is a so much bad things like that there is some good. I like that I am helping people because they need it. If it weren't for people like me that are working in hospitals and clinics who would be taking care of us?!?!?

I guess at least my job is doing some good for others right?

2 songs

So my very best friend in the world...a.k.a Pixie, has written a couple of songs and we were talking about the whole possibility of a band or something and she thought I should try writing songs too but I wasn't sure if I could do it. I mean...I write poems but songs are a little different.

She said she felt the same way and thought she could never write a song until is just came to her one night. She wasn't sure if her song was good but I really really liked it!!!!

But now I know kinda what she ment. I just had a notion to start writing a song and I have a start on two actually. I'm not sure if they are anything good but it is good practice either way. They could always be fixed up.

No sure if I will post them on here...unless people really wanna read them...let me know if ya do.

Another weekend of work

So I work all weekend like most and I have quit a bit to do. I have a lot of homework to do but at least I can get some of it done at work in the lab. I prolly will take a break from that here and there to write to my cusin that is going to school far away.
Besides that I am pretty busy this weekend. Kinda hopeing it goes by fast...but I kinda don't really want to go back home to school and all that...plus I'm sure someone needs a little more space right now....maybe I won't go back on Sunday.
We'll see.

Washcloth (E-mail from friend. LOL)

The Washcloth

This has to be read, laughed at and passed on. There is not a woman alive today who won't crack up over this!

I was due for an appointment with the gynecologist later in the week. Early one morning, I received a call from the doctor's office to tell me that I had been rescheduled for that morning at 9:30 am.
I had only just packed everyone off to work and school, and it was already around 8:45 am.
The trip to his office took about 35 minutes, so I didn't have any time to spare.
As most women do, I like to take a little extra effort over hygiene when making such visits, but this time I wasn't going to be able to make the full effort.
So, I rushed upstairs, threw off my pajamas, wet the washcloth that was sitting next to the sink, and gave myself a quick wash in "that area" to make sure I was at least presentable.
I threw the washcloth in the clothes basket, donned some clothes, hopped in the car and raced to my appointment.
I was in the waiting room for only a few minutes when I was called in.
Knowing the procedure, as I'm sure you do, I hopped up on the table, looked over at the other side of the room and pretended that I was in? Paris ?or some other place a million miles away.
I was a little surprised when the doctor said, 'My, we have made an extra effort this morning, haven't we'?
I didn't respond.

After the appointment, I heaved a sigh of relief and went home. The rest of the day was normal . Some shopping, cleaning, cooking. After school when my 6 year old daughter was playing, she called out from the bathroom, 'Mommy, where's my washcloth?
I told her to get another one from t he cupboard.
She replied, 'Nooo, I need the one that was here by the sink, it had all my glitter and sparkles saved inside it.'

………..uhhh, NEVER going back to that doctor ever!!

The Bar

At "The Bar" right now chillin' with my boyfriend. In a contest so I really hope he wins.

Difference between Knowledge and Wisdom! hahaha

This is so funny and true! Read it! You will laugh.

Knowledge is to look at a wet floor sign and to know not to walk on the wet floor.

You have knowledge at this point.

Wisdom is having walked on said floor, slipped and busted your ass, and now being smart enough not to walk on the floor when it is wet again.

You have aquired wisdom dumb ass.

Is he mad? CONT.

So my man ended up texting me when he woke up today and he said sorry he didn't call and that he loves me and can't wait to see me tonight. So I guess he isn't mad. haha. I even called him after that and said I really was sorry and he was like, "no big deal...I should have called." haha.

I guess everything is okay then so that's good. Yeah!

Is he mad?

So Friday, while my boyfriend and I were saying goodbye cause I had to go home to my hometown to work for the weekend( I work almost every weekend there)he said that he work prolly talk to be after work Saturday cause he had to work at the bar that day. Well it was a couple hours after he was off so I desided I would just call him cause maybe he forgot or was still at the bar with some friends are something.
Well he was still at the bar but he said he would call when he was leaving so we could talk and say good night. I told him I was going to bed soon cause I work really early but whatever...but before we hung up he said he would call.
Well I was drifting in and out of sleep until 1:30 I looked at my cell and he still hadn't called so I texted him something like "thanks for not calling or thanks for calling" cause I was a little upset. He texted me that he was still at the bar so he prolly stayed till close. I really hope my text didn't reck his night but he still didn't even call when he did leave! What the heck. So now I think he is prolly mad at me and I feel bad.
I called him this mornig and he didn't pick up so I left a message saying I was sorry. I just was excited that he was going to call and I really just wanted to talk to him before bed cause I miss him. Is that so bad??? I love the guy! Then I texted him a bit after saying please don't be mad at me. and I really am sorry. But he never replied yet or called so whatever.

Maybe I just won't go home after work today right away so he can chill. He will prolly be out with his friends anyway because he will think that I will be home already....

Apples and Wine (email from a friend)

I love this...
Apples and Wine

Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree.
Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they sometimes take the apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy. The apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to wait for the right man to come along, the one who is brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.

Now Men... Men are like a fine wine. They begin as grapes, and it's up to women to stomp the shit out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.

Share this with all the good apples you know.

(Goes out to you Pixie!!!!! hahaha...your a good apple)

Chillin' before class

So pixie just left a little while ago. I have class at 5 till 8 tonight so I am bored right now since my bff left. haha.

Anyway, I hope this class isn't going to be toooo bad. Looks like it's going to be a hard class but maybe my boyfriend will be able to help if I really don't get it cause he took the class a while ago. Hopefully he didn't forget everything. haha.

The start of the school year

So I started school on Monday this week again. 3rd year of college. boy oh boy! One thing good about it though is my best friend pixie is going to school at the same place now so i get to see her a lot more than before. Besides that I'm not really that excited about this year. haha.
Like tonight. I have class at 7pm till 10pm. grrrrr. haha. and I also have a night class tomorrow besides all my other classes through out the week. oh well.
Anyway...That's it for now.

~Stang~ a.k.a. guitar girl!

My 21st birthday

OMG!!!! My 21st birthday was absooooooooluuuuuttttlllly nuts! haha. I had 21 shots and I am a pretty good light weight they would say. I can't believe I didn't die! haha. It was tons of fun for the most part but the next morning wasn't all that great. lol....yeah, I had a hangover.

So anyway that night My boyfriend took me out again and I got drunk again with all the people that couldn't make it to the night before. That was pretty fun too.

Tomorrow's the big day!!

So tomorrow is my 21st Birthday!!!! I'm kinda excited for this one cause my boyfriend is 28 and I never can go to the bars with him when he goes so now it should be nice. He is even excited I will be able to hang with him at the bar now to if I want to. I'm not tooo into that seen but here and there is nice I guess.
Hope tomorrow goes great. I even made a treat for the people I work with tomorrow!!!! They betta be happy I'm bringing them somethin'!!! hahaha.

Don't know how to tell him...

I love my boyfriend so much and he knows how I feel because I don't have that big of a problem telling him but I just wish I knew how he felt more. I know that he loves me but will it ever be more???
I can see myself being with him forever but can he see being with me forever??? Is it even possible for 2 people to stay with one another forever with the devorce rate these days?!? I try to believe that it is possible but it's hard.

I really want to tell him that I know he isn't ready to hear the serious things that I feel because he isn't at that point in his like but I am afraid that what he would say to that and if that would hurt his feelings.....even worse.....would he dump me???

Sitting in the living room

So I really bored right now and I am just waiting for my boyfriend to get home. He had some things to do and he stopped at the bar for a little while so I have some time to just blog.
He had 2 volleyball games today that I went to like always. It was alright but I was getting pretty cold by the end so it was nice that we left pretty much right after it was done.

lol! Something funny that happened when we first got home was that my boyfriend gave me a kiss before we walked into the doorway. Whenever I have lip gloss on he always says "sticky lips...yucky!!!" hahaha...and he did it today. haha..."I said stop it! haha". No what he said?....."I still like to kiss your lips...stick and all." awwww....how sweet.

Anyway...that's it for now I guess. I don't really have anything else to talk about.

Until next time,

Guitar Goddess.

How well do I really know him?

So I'm reading a book(I know pixie..wow! haha) and that book really got me thinking about how well I really know my boyfriend. I mean in this book this girl as this bond with a guy and they play a game they call truth and that is how they really got to know eachother in a short time I guess you could say.
This girl ends up thinking about how well she really knows everyone else and comes to the relization that she doesn't really know them all that well, even her own mother, let alone them really knowing her.
Because of that section in the book it was making me think about things that I have never really asked my boyfriend which suprised me because every past relationship I pretty much know everything for the most part cause we always went to school together or something like that so that was never a question. But with my boyfriend now...I'm going to be 21 this Friday and he is 28 and we have only known eachother for a year now so I don't REALLY know his past nor does he REALLY know mine. Of course things come up that we have talked about like school in the past and childhood memories and such but I have came to realize I really don't know a who lot about him. I love him dearly and he is one of the most important people in my life...I even woke up on Friday morning next to him thinking about how I honestly can't imagine my life without him....isn't that a scary thought?!
I guess the biggest question in my mind that popped up that I want to know the most right now is "what is he most afraid of?" It's something I have always known about the serious relationships that I have been in..even some of the not so serious. I just want to know but I know how he is to and I can't help but to wonder if he really even knows what his biggest fear is?
I have my ideas on what it is but I choose not to speek them. I would rather not be wrong on that subject.

WHAT DO I DO!?!

So I feel absolutely awful because my very best friend in the whole world wants to die. I love her so much...does she not realize that. I need her here even if she doesn't see it. She's prolly the only one that will read this even but whatever. I need you in my life Pixie and if you leave here I will die along with you...even if my body is still working and here on earth, if you aren't here and well with me to bring joy and comfort to my life it would TOTALLY SUCK without you and I would be forever depressed without you.

One of those weekends

Looks like it's going to be another one of those weekends where it's pretty busy at work(I'm a phlebotomist) and I have tons to do when I get done with work today and tomorrow. I have a few minutes to breath now so it's nice.

My grandma and grandpa on one side gave me my birthday card early this year so I wanted to stop over there since I am in town to work and all and say thank you...plus one of my moms friends had a baby a couple weeks ago and I should go see how big he's getting. My lil and only sis wants me to play tennis with her today aswell and I really should as I feel bad for the last time I was home I had to turn her down. haha...she seems to miss me for some reason now that I am gone I guess most of the time. Gotta love her! :-)

Many other little things to do but those are just a few of the big ones... hope I get everything done and don't feel so stressed. lol.

goodbye for now.

A Person

This is just one of my poems I have writen....just thought I'd put it out there.

A Person

Who is the person that is always there,
every time the world's not fair.
Who is the person that helps you out,
when you are in a problem and can't seem to get out.
Who is the person that gives you a hug,
which makes you feel better when no one else would.
Who is the person that is true to you,
the person that stands up for you.
The person that you can go to,
no matter what's up.
The person that's there when your
boyfriend and you split up.
The person that this is,
is someone close to you.
The person is your best friend,
who is always there for you.